Friday, April 10, 2009

Communicating with your children, communicating with juries

In the middle of spending a weekend with my children (ages 16 & 20), I am led to question my ability to communicate. I cannot get them to tell me about their favorite childhood memory, or even when I specify their favorite vacation, I get nothing. Asked about the thing they remember most about the house we lived at the longest (which had a pool & kids always around), they claim to remember nothing. When asked about what they remember about a specific vacation, nothing. (My oldest, who is the nicest to me, was busy deleting photos off her phone. My youngest rolls her eyes at everything that I say.)

I spend lots of $, I spend my time, I give my heart - what do I get in return - nothing.

So, I wonder what do we really get when we question potential jurors. I shared things with my children, trying to open them up. Made suggestions about various memories - because I know them - and yet I got nothing. Every once in a while I'd get an oh, yeah, I remember that.

Very scary. And these are my children who see me feel sad & supposedly don't want that. They have no agenda to hurt me - they just don't really care to have their thoughts or time interrupted.

So, what about jurors who are missing work - not getting paid OR paying someone to take care of the children they normally take care of. What are we getting from them? What agenda do the talkers come to us with? The silent folks (who can't wait to hang the next SOB?!)

I think of myself as a good communicator. I think of myself as one who can move mountains - convince others that I am correct - that there is reasonable doubt. Yet I can't convince my children that their ivory tower, silver spoon lives have anything worth sharing - apparently.

So who is sitting on my juries? (And given the positive outcomes, maybe I should just continue to be unable to communicate. Or maybe I was cutting all the youngsters off. I can't remember now. I can't remember anything right now.)

So, who do you THINK you are communicating with? (And how much have you spent to do it?!)

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